William Penn Jr.

Everything was falling apart, including the king, who had had his head cut off for losing the war. There were wars and rumors of wars, pestilence, famines, fire, floods, and earthquakes, no one knew what was going to happen next. In other words, it was exactly like today. Nobody knows what's going to happen next. A young man named George Fox had been traveling the countryside looking for something to do with his life, which is exactly what young people ought to be doing. But after four years of searching, George still hadn't found what he was looking for. He might as well have gotten to the university. He couldn't find anything that satisfied him inside, where he really felt and thought and lived. So he thought he'd start something of his own. He realized that life would be better if people were nicer. If they could look inside themselves and find a way always to be good and kind and courteous, sympathetic, generous, peaceful, brave, all the things people would be if only they had the courage to be that way. Instead of trying to be just like everybody else. And you know what they're like. 

So George called his idea. The society of Friends. And he talked over to anyone who would listen. And he was very good at it. By the end of the last century, 10% of the population of England had become quakers. The king was beside himself, his favorite position. Where was he going to find soldiers to fight the French, and everyone else he didn't like? If everyone was becoming a pacifist who would not join the army or the navy, the army and the navy didn't like them either. The Church of England didn't like them, because quakers didn't believe you needed a huge cathedral in all of that, but only a quiet place to examine your conscience. The aristocracy particularly did not like the Friends for the Friends believe that no one is born better than anyone else. Everyone is equal in the eyes of the lord. And so why do we need kings, queens, princes, princesses, and all those other expensive people. It began to look as though nobody liked the Friends, except the people. But the people weren't in charge, and the people in charge passed laws against them through them into jail by the thousands over 15,000 Friends were imprisoned in those days, including mister Fox, including myself. But no matter what the authorities tried to do, we became stronger and more determined for methods like that have never worked, it didn't work with the Egyptians in the Israelites. 

It didn't work with the Romans and the Christians. It didn't work with the English and as quakers, and it still doesn't work. But the king had to give up. His jails were full, he couldn't afford to chase us around anymore. He passed the toleration act, which meant he would be anything you want to be in England as long as you behave yourself. Pay your taxes and don't frighten the horses. He just wished he would go away. And one day he got his wish. For even a Keaton can have a wish come true. And it seems that King Charles the second, owed my father. Admiral, Sir William Penn, about 16,000 English pounds Sterling. For the admiral had once fed the Royal Navy out of his own pocket when the king couldn't afford to. And the king couldn't afford to pay the money back when my father died. So he offered me land. Lots of land. 

Over here, that he didn't really own. But that's the king for you. It's good to be the king. The king called this land, Pennsylvania, in honor of my father, admiral Penn, thereby embarrassing me terribly. For we Friends, we quakers are not supposed to splash the family name of a green big things like that. It's just isn't right, too proud, too vain. I begged the king to change his mind, but he didn't have to change his mind. He was the king. Then I actually tried to bribe the clerk to change the name on the title. Easy enough. But the clerk liked his job and his head and would not take the bribe. How things have changed.